Depending on where you are in the world, you may have seen in the
media that today has been dubbed: ‘Divorce Day.’
Apparently, the first Monday of the first full working week of January is the busiest day of the year for divorce lawyers, with their phones ringing off the hook.
It’s not hard to understand why this may be the case.
Christmas, and the lead up to it, can be a particularly stressful time of year, even for those in the happiest and most harmonious of relationships.
We put so much responsibility on ourselves to get everything just right for our families. And often end up running ourselves ragged in our attempts to do so.
This heightened state of being can lead to conflict and arguments with the result that we end up feeling like a pressure-cooker valve that’s ready to explode!
When you throw into the mix a marriage that was already under severe strain long before the Festive Season began, to the point that you were considering leaving but had decided: ‘I just need to get through Christmas,’ it’s hardly surprising that many of us feel ready to call it a day come the beginning of January.
The Blame Game
So often, we make the decision to leave our marriages from a place of resentment and anger. We blame our husbands for our unhappiness and see ourselves as the victim, and him the villain.
It’s all too easy to fall into this way of thinking. Been there, done that.
And while it seems easier to point the finger of blame outside ourselves, ultimately it helps no-one, least of all us.
Making such a life-altering decision as leaving our marriage from these negative emotions is not only short-sighted, it robs us of our power.
Once the conflict has died down, we are left feeling confused, conflicted and full of fear – not to mention guilt about the impact of our decision on our kids, our family and even our husbands.
This leads to us questioning our decision and quite possibly back-tracking – only to find ourselves repeating the exact same pattern a few weeks, or months, down the line.
If you’ve been following my work for any length of time, you know I strongly recommend making any decision to leave your marriage from a place of self-responsibility and empowerment.
You may be thinking, well that sounds great, but exactly how do I do that?!
In a nut-shell, it boils down to the following three steps:
1) Making a conscious choice to reclaim responsibility for your own happiness and refusing to be a victim in your life and marriage.
2) Doing your own inner work by taking the time to figure out who you are today and what you actually want for your life now.
This involves the deep work of telling yourself the truth, perhaps for the first time.
3) Deciding, on purpose, to move beyond your fears and limitations and using your courage to make empowered choices to create your ‘right’ life, however, that looks for you.
And putting those choices into action.
And not apologising for them.
It’s that simple. And not necessarily easy.
But it’s absolutely possible.
I have done it.
And so have many, many, women that I’ve had the privilege of supporting.
It’s exactly what my work is designed to do.
If you’re ready to take responsibility for your own happiness and make empowered choices about the future of your life and marriage. And if you’d like to do so in the company of a small, intimate group of like-minded women, led by a coach who has been where you are now:
You’re in the right place…
The Untethered Wife Group Programme:
Registration Opens This Week.
Following the inaugural launch of my intimate group programme, The Untethered Wife, registration opens later this week for the next round of this eight week experience.
We start 30th January.
I’ll be offering an exclusive, early booking discount to my Newsletter subscribers (if you’re not on the List you can sign up using the link below.)
I can’t wait to get started.
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