Today is the eighth anniversary of my lovely
dad’s death. It’s hard for me to believe he’s been gone that long; he was such a gentle soul, and in his own quiet way, a great teacher for me. I miss him every day.
If you’ve been following my musings for any length of time, you may know that losing my dad was the catalyst that sparked massive change in my life.
My Wake Up Call
Losing a parent made me acutely aware of my own mortality. It was a huge wake-up call. I began questioning my whole life: my marriage, my career, my aspirations, my happiness. Everything.
Increasingly, I wondered: “Is This it – is This all there is?”
Within a year of my dad’s loss, I had left my 22-year marriage. And my corporate career of the same length. Leaving behind those two ‘constants’ in my life was terrifying. Yet absolutely right for me.
The self-reflection my dad’s death ignited was undoubtedly the first step towards changing my life.
The One Tool That Helped Me
But if I’m completely honest, I don’t know that it would have been enough by itself to see me through to actually making and acting on those life-altering decisions.I’m not sure I would have had the courage or self-belief.
I was a different person back then. I was hiding in my life and career. I wasn’t courageous. I just wanted to keep my head down and be invisible so that nobody would realise the truth about me: that I was a big fraud and not good enough. Yep, those were my beliefs. I felt like an imposter in my own life.
So when I took the bold, out-of-comfort-zone decision to embark upon life coach training, I did so for purely personal development reasons.
I didn’t dream I could become a professional coach and make a career out of doing work I loved and that gave me such a sense of purpose. Back then if anybody had suggested it, my thought would have been: ‘Don’t be ridiculous. Who am I to think I can do that?’
I also didn’t dream I could not only survive, but thrive, outside of my marriage.
The ONE tool that gave me the courage and confidence to follow through with making those huge leaps of faith? Coaching.
Coaching allowed me to believe in myself and to believe that my happiness mattered. That ‘I’ mattered. That I deserved to live a happy, fulfilling life being true to myself. And that I had everything within me to create that life.
It makes me shudder to think where I might be now if I hadn’t found this path. Maybe I would have found another way, maybe not. Who knows?
Coaching was, and continues to be, an investment of my time, money, energy and faith. Every one of those investments, whether coach training (I’ve got three Certifications!) or hiring my own personal coaches, started with the belief that my happiness and fulfilment were worth investing in. That ‘I’ was worth investing in.
It’s no surprise that my personal experiences form a huge part of my ‘Why.’ It’s why I’m here today, eight years on, doing this work. Supporting other women who feel the way I did, yet who know deep inside, there is so much more for them to do and so much more for them to be in their lives.
I know firsthand what is possible when you do this ‘self’ work. It sounds cliche to say coaching completely changed my life, but it’s the truth.
I feel privileged to do the work I do and I get such a thrill when I see the results my clients achieve for themselves. It’s an honour for me to support them, and while I don’t under-estimate the role I play, it is my clients who do the work.
I know how much courage it takes and I am so proud of the women I work with.
One of my lovely clients who made some bold and courageous changes in her life recently sent me a Thank You card and she has given me permission to share her words with you today via the above image.
I’m including her actual handwritten words not to blow my own trumpet – though of course I won’t pretend that receiving this kind of acknowledgement doesn’t make me feel proud of the difference my work makes. Of course it does!
The reason I’m sharing this is because I want you to know: You deserve this too.
So many women are either afraid or simply don’t believe they are worth the effort of figuring out what their ‘right’ lives look like. Or they don’t believe it’s possible for them.
Instead, they settle for living a half life. They tell themselves it will be their turn for happiness ‘one day.’ One day that turns into months and years, then decades. A lifetime.
Maybe coaching is the right solution to get you unstuck in your life and marriage. Or maybe it’s something else. You will know what feels right when you find it. And you will know who the right person is to support you when you connect with them.
My One Wish for You:
Invest in your future self. Find the path that’s right for you. Commit to it. And then do the work. Don’t stay stuck in a life or marriage that no longer fits you.
Don’t allow fear to remain in the driver’s seat of your one precious life.
You deserve so much more.
The first and most important step is believing you are worth it. I believe it. The question is – do you?
Want to Talk About It?
If you’d like to explore whether coaching with me via my Empowered Choices, Empowered Woman Programme may be the right solution for you, get in touch to request your confidential 30 minute Mini Clarity Session. There’s no obligation, you will gain clarity on your situation and the next step to move you forward. What do you have to lose?
Email me at Julie@JulieMarah.com and we’ll get you scheduled.
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