The Biggest Lie

I dont have time

  • I’ve got too much going on to even think about this.
  • I haven’t got the time/money/energy to do it right now.
  • I’m not in the right headspace for it.
  • It’s not that important – really.
  • I’m so stressed at the moment I can’t even think about it.
  • I’ll make it a priority tomorrow/next week/next month/next year/next lifetime.

Also known as:

“I.     Don’t.     Have.     Time.”

It sounds like the truth.

We really are busy.

So busy.

Busier than we’ve ever been.

We really do have lots going on.

We really don’t have time.

Yeah, yeah. Whatever.

Actually. It’s bullshit.

It’s the biggest lie we tell ourselves.

And the biggest disrespect we pay to ourselves.

Time for What Really Matters

Think about it.

Don’t we always manage to find time for what really matters to us?

Think about the things in your life you’re currently doing that are really important to you.


Whether it’s brushing your teeth. Attending your child’s school events. Going to yoga.

Whatever it is for you. Do you somehow manage to find/make/create/juggle time so you can do them?

Thought so. Me too.

How Much Do You Want It – Really?

So, what’s really going on?

What would happen if we told ourselves the truth?

And made time for that thing we keep saying is so important to us.

That thing we say we really, really want.

We’d have to commit.

Actually do it.

Take the scary actions.

Answer the questions we’ve been avoiding.

Look within.

Put ourselves on the line.

Make ourselves vulnerable.

Be willing to fail.

Get it wrong.

Spend time out of our comfort zone.

Embrace change. Embrace uncertainty.

With no guarantee of the final outcome.

It’s scary.

It takes courage.

It takes commitment to ourselves.

It takes loving ourselves enough to say Yes to ourselves.

Staying busy is easy.

Saying Yes to ourselves can be hard.

The Antidote

Tell yourself the truth.

Decide how important that thing you say you want really is to you.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (with 1 not at all, 10 completely) how much do you want it?

Do you really want it – or do you just like the idea of wanting it?

What difference will achieving this thing make to your life? Why oh why do you want it so much?

What’s your Why? Pinpoint it. Be specific – it’s the thing that will keep you going when the going gets tough and you want to give up.

What are you willing to change, let go of or say no to in order to make space in your life for what you truly want?


Commit. Or don’t.

Make a conscious choice.

In the words of Yoda: “Do or don’t do. There is no try.”

The only person stopping you is you.

Admit you’re scared. Or you don’t know where to start. Or you need help. It’s okay.

Just tell yourself the truth.

Not the bullshit version.

Give yourself the respect you deserve.

Ready to Make Time to Stay Married Without Losing Your Sanity?

If you enjoyed this article and you’re ready to make time for what’s important in your life and marriage, download your copy of my Free eGuide Five Secrets to Staying Married Without Losing Your Sanity! I will walk you through the exact steps you can start taking today to regain control and start creating the changes you want. Here’s the link: Five-secrets.

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One Comment

  1. Yes! There are so often things I feel like “I don’t have time” for – but when push comes to shove, there is some other reason I am pushing it away.

    Next time I face one, I’m going to think about my why, then decide and commit – one way or the other!

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